The twilight Zone

While driving,sometimes i feel that the other motorists are punishing me for adhering to the rules.
For example if i am on a junction,and the although the other motorists have the right of way,but still somebody has to slow down and let me join the lane.
But sometimes,people don't bother,they make me lose my minutes to save their seconds.
It doesn't take much effort for them to slow down a bit and make room for a person who has a sore neck due to continuously looking right for the last 10 minutes.
Rant over

The Central Intelligence Agency is the younger and dumber sibling of the Central Stupidity Agency. The CIA, which is sometimes known as the Challenged Intellectual Association and occasionally referred to as Corny Inbred Americans, takes a leading role in the USA's efforts to totally piss off the rest of the world. Essentially, this organisation is the Catalyst for International Attrocities.

Regardless of what people say, as an organization CIA is definitely not lazy!! CIA has worked hard internationally to supply up-and-coming terrorist groups with weapons, overtrowing democratically elected governments, supporting death squads, providing Mujahideen with arms and ammo (which they later used to shot at..), entrusting Saddam with weapons (which he later..) - you name it, they've done it... They like to see themselves as "the guys that are always there - over on the wrong side of the fence" or "if it's immoral, but doesn't serve a higher purpose, then WE'LL DO IT!".

It is infact a highly misunderstood office of government, and was recently rated #2 in the 100 Best Intelligence Agencies program on Channel 4 (losing out to those nice fellows at the KG. Despite being criticised as having done more harm than good in all it does, the CIA has had a remarkable number of success stories including the finding of our beloved Lord High Abitar, George Dubbaya Bush after he got lost on a walk around his ranch.
The CIA doesnt spy on anyone, your grandma tells them everything about you, so they'll arest you and get her out of the retirement home you put her in. They used to be big in spying, but they were forced to abandon this strategy since they weren't that wonderful on the intelligence thingy. Last time they tried they really did their best, but they were simply unlucky when they misstook the exchaust pipes from a car for a nuclear device.
The CIA would have you believe they are constantly watching terrorists in an attempt to keep you safe. But don't believe this hype - that's what they want you to think!

Research show that CIA employees actually spend much of their time researching the content on websites with titles such as upskirtgirls.com and guten-tag-herr-dingdong.de. But, lets face it, if you had that kind of power, you would be doing the same thing. The honest truth is that the CIA doesn't give a damn about what terrorists do to you or your cats. There was a time when the CIA gave serious consideration to fighting terrorism. However, they haven't been able to find an agent as cool as MI6's 007 - they just wouldn't measure up. It would be like comparing a horse's penis and a cippilata.

Unbeknownst to them, the British have also invested heavily in terrorist groups around the world in recent years as part of their underdog-backing (similar to America's underdog-fucking, but completely different in every way) national belief system. Despite their best efforts, terrorism appeared to be in major decline around the world, with numbers in Northern Ireland, a former stronghold of CIA-backed terror, declining to the point of Seriously Endangered. However in a stroke of genius, the American president, with the help of his British allies, were able to mix religion with warfare to create a potent catalyst for international terrorism. Thanks to him the future employment of both 007 and the CIA are assured.

Bush declares war on fire

Bush's response was immediate and decisive. "I learned from the mistakes I made after hurricane...Kathy," said the president, "I should have declared war on hurricanes immediately afterwards. I'm sure it would have saved many an innocent...urm...life. But I won't be making that mistake again. Fire is evil, and I will not back down until the world is rid of it...FOREVER!!!"
Bush announced that he was declaring a global war against all forms of fire, as it "Is a major menace to society and must be destroyed completely. We will live in a world completely free of any fires!!!" Several thousand army troops were sent into California the instant Bush declared war. "Fire is a tough opponent," says one soldier, "We dropped about 800 bombs on the fire yesterday, but they didn't seem to make any difference. As a matter of fact, I got the impression that they were only serving to make the flames bigger."

When asked why he thought shooting the fire wasn't working, Bush said "It's not working because we don't have enough troops, and our guns aren't big enough. I assure you, we will win, if you give me another 45 billion dollars to buy more equipment. Fire can be killed, because I believe it can be killed. I stand by my beliefs. I believe this is...uh...good." Despite his optimism, the fires continue to spread with every large missile that is dropped on them.
Seeing as shooting fire will never kill it, as shooting it or bombing it merely creates more, this global war on fire is unlikely to end anytime soon. However, this prospect does not seem to have entered the mind of President Bush, who has announced that after the fire in California is out, the United States will be invading a volcano.