The twilight Zone

Amanda and Sam win the Big Bro.

As if they are listening

http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20070831/ap_on_re_mi_ea/iraq

At least 135,129 lives lost to date and counting.

http://www.blog.co.uk/user/Narvasadata

Have a look,but then don't blame me

1. That's not right ........................ Sum Ting Wong

2. Are you harboring a fugitive?............. Hu Yu Hai Ding

3. See me ASAP................................ Kum Hia Nao

4. Small Horse .............................. Tai Ni Po Ni

5. Did you go to the beach? ................... Wai Yu So Tan

6. I bumped into a coffee table ............. Ai Bang Mai Ni

7. I think you need a face lift ............... Chin Tu Fat

8. It's very dark in here ................... Wao So Dim

9. I thought you were on a diet ............ Wai Yu Mun Ching?

10. This is a tow away zone ................. No Pah King

11. Our meeting is scheduled for next week ... Wai Yu Kum Nao?

12. Staying out of sight .................... Lei Ying Lo

13. He's cleaning his automobile ............ Wa Shing Ka

14. Your body odor is offensive ............. Yu Stin Ki Pu

'Surgeon stole my bum'

A German belly dancer has been awarded £12,000 compensation after a plastic surgeon accidentally sucked away one of her buttocks.

Julia 'Cleopatra' Meyer, 38, from Munich, wanted slimmer thighs and instead ended up with half her bum missing.

The court heard that during the liposuction the plastic surgeon, not named, from a private clinic, had removed fat from her right buttock instead of her thighs.

She said: "I had been unhappy with my saddlebags, the fat stored in the outer thigh area. Because of the local anaesthesia I did not realise what he was doing.

"When I saw afterwards that half of my bum was missing I almost fainted. It had been completely sucked away."

A consultant at the Berlin Charité hospital asked for an expert opinion said it was a "grave error in treatment".

The court heard the woman can no longer perform. She does not even dare to go to a swimming pool because she is ashamed of the way she looks.

The surgeon has been ordered to pay her £12,000 - twice the £6,000 she had been seeking.

USA signs a so called civilian nuclear deal with India.
http://www.cnn.com/2007/WORLD/asiapcf/07/27/us.india.nuclear/index.html#cnnSTCText?iref=werecommend
So India will increase and develop it's nuclear assets.
Across the border,neighboring Pakistan will do the same to compete.
As both nations are living in an environment of suspicion about each other.
Eventually uncle sam will change costumes and sell nuclear stuff to both the countries for hefty sums. And someday,all of a sudden both countries may be raining their Nuclear tipped missiles on each other.
But then it's business as usual fo my dear Sammy,they got stuff to sell,why not make money out of it?

Freakin hackers

The Australian federal government is in fire-fighting mode following reports that a 16 year-old schoolboy hacked his way through an Au$84m internet porn filter launched by the government earlier this month.
http://www.vnunet.com/vnunet/news/2197474/child-beats-australia-national

But couldn't rescue 6 trapped miners in three weeks.
It's a shame.

Is polygamy no more practiced.....Think again?
People have one registered wife/husband and at the same time a few girl/boy friends..something equivalent to polygamy?

http://rock1053.com/pages/virtualgirlfriend/virtualgirlfriend.html

visit the website and type a rude word,then look what she does.

http://karigirl.com/index-1.html

Its an Artificial intelligence software,not free though,costs some money.But it is fun to use.
It's virtual girlfriend,you got to deal with her,as the program develops her personality according to your behavior.
She speaks laughs cries,and shows all kind of girly emotions.
Have fun.

Been selling on ebay for about an year now.My obsession with PC graphics cards made me to source out the rarest pc gaming accessories available.
Made a little amount of money,but the main purpose was to fulfil my life long dream of having my own business.
Still i can't call it a "business" but something similar.
These days sale on ebay has been particularly slow,and the graphics cards which are otherwise sold at a higher price elsewhere,i had to sell them on some loss.
So it's time to move on and register with Google products and some other shopping websites,specially for PC equipment.
Any suggestions?

Something unusual?

She loved her teeth and spend too much time cleaning them,thats why i dumped her

She was too shy,and not much fun

Too scared of the boogey man

Rebellious nature,won't let me control her

Always had a headache

Huh control freak

Always had a bad hair day

Angry all the time,lost her chill pills

There a few out there but tis one is my favourit.It's simple and at it's lowest level won't need even a hard drive.
Looks good and performs all the necessary functions such as web browsing,spread sheets,letters and media playing.It's linux based and has a whole lot of free softwares down loadable online.
Try http://www.ubuntu.com/products/WhatIsUbuntu/desktopedition

Don't forget to read the subscript.Its funny

I am a born muslim a from Pakistan.Although now living in da Yoo Kay.
The way i was brought up was very differant from here.Back home it's a total insulation between boys and girls.
Each clinging to side of the fence.
Although i have built in respect for women,no matter what she does,she gets excused just for being a woman.
Our teachings were that we can't shout at a woman,can't talk to her if she doesn't want,and even if she talks to us there should be no use of rude language.
Touching a woman if she is not my wife was unimaginable.
Where i live,if we are in a public transport,and all seats are full,and a woman comes in.Men will stand up for her as traditionally women don't stand in public transport.They have to be seated.
If a woman says that a particular man has done something indescent to her,the man gets done without any further evidence.It is assumed that if a woman is making such a claim,it has got to be true.
Due to reasons unknown to me men die a lot earlier than women.The average life expectency of a man in my area is around 45 years,but for a woman it is around 65 years.
Although i have mentioned many prostitute stories,which i experienced round the world.I have not been in contact with many women during my life.
I have always befriended men,because in my culture there is no concept of befriendind the opposite sex.
I have alwys been ok with that.Never felt the need of a lady friend.
Men are men,and mostly the same frequency as i am,and women are tangled twisted and difficult to understand.
Atleast that has been my experience in this country where on experimental basis i befriended a few women.
All from differant ethnic origins.I got white,black and half cast lady friends.
Initially i thought that ethnic origin defines the woman's behaviour,but now i realise that i was wrong.
It has not been a bad experience.It was good to have some female friends,but i found them to be high maintenance.
The women i befriended tend to have obsessive behaviour.In the begining they will bombard me with round the clock texts and phonecalls,and will go with me to my favourite restaurants for a meal,whenever i will invite them.
But all of a sudden,without any understandable reason,they will lose interest.
Won't reply to my texts,won't attend my calls,and will always come up with an excuse if ask them to meet me.
This behaviour has induced into me the tendency of "fire and forget".
Initially it used to be a bit of a shock for me,that a friend is avoiding me for no good reason.But now i have learnt to move on.
I make new lady friends and delete the old one's numbers emails texts and all.
I used to be a clingon. Still am with my male friends.
Some of them are my friends for over 20 years now,but the same kind of long term friendship with women is a bit of a challange.
Although i am good at blocking my sexual feelings,and a lady friend is just a friend to me,nothing elase,and all ladies initially say to me that all the want is afriend,and that is what i do to them,but even then it doesn't last too long.
There is a problem with me too.There may be others also,but this one has been prominent.
I nees time and attention from my friends,and give back the same.I tend to see each of my friends once a week,or atleast once a month.If i call them on their mobiles,i expect them to attend my call,or later call me back.If i text them i expect a reply.
I found my lady friends to be very illusive.They never come us with a solid sentence.If i am joking with them,and they didn't like it,they won't say.They will just change their behaviour instead.
If they want something from me,again they won't say it clearly,but behave differantly,and expect me to guess what they want.
I am not too good at guessing though.
Thats why i say,life goes on and nothing really matters.Good day all

I was turning right from the left hand side of the road,and was looking for any incoming traffic from my left side.As i saw the lane is clear and started my U turn i heard a bang and my car stopped.
There was an old vauxhall astra crushed between the curb and my car.
My car had collided head on with the front left door of the other car.
I have a bulky 2 litre ford mondeo glx,and that was a little astra.
Apparantly the driver was coming in the wrong lane,infact in the opposite lane,presumably overtaking some card that stopped to make way for me.
Assuming that it was not my fault,i thought that i can now claim some insurance and get my car fixed.Althogh my car only sustained sone scratches on the front bumber,and the other car had a big dent in the door,but then it was not my fault.
As i parked my car and saw the other driver parking on the curb,i approached the driver side,and it was a lady.
In fact it was a crying lady sitting on the driver seat.All my plans of taking the insurance number and then making the claim went down the drain,and all i could think now was to try and calm her down
She knew that she had done something wrong and saying something about having a bad day at work.
It took me about ten minutes to assure her that i am not going to call the police or make any insurance claim against her.
Finally she stopped crying and i felt much better,i gave her a pat on her shoulder,i don't know for what and drove away.
Stupid me

Sunshine is so rare that they have to google it to find out whats that shiny yellow thing in the sky

You are young only once but you can be immature forever.

For photo editing
http://www.gimp.org/

For playing any type of video.
http://www.videolan.org/vlc/

For burning CD/DVD
http://www.cdburnerxp.se/

Enjoy

I have come to a conclusion. "Nothing matters" . We live on.
People come and go.Financial gains and losses.Makes us sad for sometime or make us suffer for sometime.But life goes on. End of the day it all becomes past and "Nothing matters"

Good night all

AMD socket 939 Athlon 3800+ processo,MSI neo-2 ms-7194 motherboard,1gb pc3200 DDR400 RAM,Ati Radeon x850xt graphics card.
Usually it takes an hour or two to assemble all these components and then load some crap version of windows.
It took me two days to build this PC
Problem one: The bios won't show the setup screen and the PC would Re-boot every time i tried.The RAM was found faulty although it was new.I changed the RAM and still the system was uhstable.Finally changing the slot from DIMM1 to DIMM2 solved the problem.
Problem two:The PC would work fine for about 15 minutes and then Re-boot.
The CPU was overheating,although the fan was working fine.I found out that the thermal paste was not enough.
Applying some more thermal paste under the heat sink cooled down the CPU.
Problem Three:The PC would boot OK and the mouse won't work.
The mouse was changed and all was ok.
Problem Four:The PC would boot ok,band after the windows have started,it won't connect to the internet,although the drivers and modem were ok.
I found that there was some conflict betwen the Ethernet adapter and the Broadband Modem.Disabling the Ethernet adapter solved the problem.
Problem Five:All was Ok but no sound.Eventually changing the Antivirus software solved the problem as it was blocking the sound card driver.
Now i have another spanking new Gaming PC in front of me and it is perfect,but i am too tired to paly some games on it

Last week we had some sunny spells,and it was nice.
I went to the blackpool beach for a dip in the sea.I wandered on the beach,looking for someone who was swimming,and found nobody.So i came back from the beach without even taking off my shirt.
In other news it's a nice rainy morning,everything is grey.Not a hint of sunshine.

A few months ago my bank which happens to be RBS,charged me about 250 ponds for some returned direct debits.
I had transferred money in another account with the same bank,but since that particular account did not have money so they charged me at the rate of 38 pounds per refused DD.
I have 3 accounts with RBS,and i get an interest of a few pennies on my few thousands of pounds.But their money is so precious that they have been charging me an interest of one pound per pound per month.So the total amount almost doubles each month.
I hired a lawyer and they have been negotiating with the bank.The charges on one account have been returned by RBS,but some how they managed to charge me on all three of my accounts,and the bank is being unable to explain how they did it.
One thing i do not understand.We give all our money to them,and they do business on our money,and earn a hell lot of profit.Even then they charge us for their so called services.It should be us charging them for our services,that we trust them and give them all our hard earned money only to be robbed again and again.
It appears that we consumers have got no rights.We do not have the option to use a bank or not to use it.In this country it is mandatory to have a bank account due to BACS.
Plus they always got their dubious terms & conditions on which we have to sign to open the account.They wave it in front of our faces and show some phrase in it,which can have more than a hundred meanings,but the accept the meaning which suits them.
So i am not going to pay them a penny,no matter what it takes,even if i had to pay the lawyer double the amount, i will do that.
Wish me good luck

Reformat his hard drive

Nothing hurts a man more than losing all of his porn.

How did you happen to go to Dr. Cherney?

Well, a gal down the road had had several

of her children by Dr. Cherney, and said

he was really good.

Do you know how far pregnant you are right now?

I will be three months November 8th.

Apparently then, the date of conception

was August 8th?

Yes.

What were you and your husband doing at that time?

Mrs. Smith, do you believe that you

are emotionally unstable?

I used to be.

How many times have you comitted suicide?

Four times.

Were you aquainted with the deceased?

Yes, sir.

Before or after he died?

Officer, what led you to believe the defendant was under the influence?

Because he was argumentary and he couldn’t pronunciate his words.

What happened then?

He told me, he says, “I have to kill you because you can identify me.”

Did he kill you?

No.

Mrs. Jones, is your appearance this morning pursuant to a deposition notice which I sent to your attorney?

No. This is how I dress when I go to work.

THE COURT: Now, as we begin, I must ask you to banish all present information and prejudice from your minds, if you have any.

Doctor, how many autopsies have you peformed

on dead people?

All my autopsies have been performed

on dead people.

Did he pick the dog up by the ears?

No.

What was he doing with the dog’s ears?

Picking them up in the air.

Where was the dog at this time?

Attached to the ears.

When he went, had you gone and had she, if she wanted to and were able, for the time being excluding all the restraints on her not to go, gone also, would he have brought you, meaning you and she, with him to the station?

MR. BROOKS: Objection. That question should be taken out and shot.

And lastly, Gary, all your responses must

be oral O.K.?
What school do you go to?

Oral.

How old are you?

Oral.

What is your relationship with the plaintiff?

She is my daughter.

Was she your daughter on February 13, 1979?

Now, you have investigated other murders, have you not, where there was a victim?

…and what did he do then?

He came home, and next morning he was dead.

So when he woke up the next morning he was dead?

Did you tell your lawyer that your husband had offered you indignities?

He didn’t offer me nothing; he just said I could have the furniture.

So, after the anesthesia, when you came out of it, what did you observe with respect to your scalp?

I didn’t see my scalp the whole time

I was in the hospital.

It was covered?

Yes, bandaged.

Then, later on.. what did you see?

I had a skin graft. My whole buttocks and leg were removed and put on top of my head.

Could you see him from where you were standing?

I could see his head.

And where was his head?

Just above his shoulders.

What can you tell us about the truthfulness and veracity of this defendant?

Oh, she will tell the truth. She said she’d kill that sonofabitch - and she did!

Do you drink when you’re on duty?

I don’t drink when I’m on duty,

unless I come on duty drunk.

…any suggestions as to what prevented this from being a murder trial instead of an attempted

murder trial?
The victim lived.

Are you qualified to give a urine sample?

Yes, I have been since early childhood.

The truth of the matter is that you were not an unbiased, objective witness, isn’t it. You too were shot in the fracas?

No, sir. I was shot midway between the fracas and the naval.

What is the meaning of sperm being present?

It indicates intercourse.

Male sperm?

That is the only kind I know.

And was that the same nose you broke as a child?

Are you sexually active?

No, I just lie there.

Today i found out that i am too bad at guessing ladies breast size
Here is the test Guess the breast size

Go on , nothing too rude ,just funny.

Thats why i love global warming

# godawful bollock wrong dick,
# roboplegic wrong cock,

So i have been tagged

Yesterday,due to some unknown reasons i decided to build a new PC for me.
Went to the shop and bought an AMD AM2 dual core processor,an aus SLI motherboard,and 1GB of 533Mhz RAM.
Total bill 75 pounds.
I already had a 160 GB Hard drive,and n ATI Radeon X800XT graphics card.
Assembled the pc in 20 minutes,and it wont power up .
It took me an hour to figure out hat the graphics card was drawing too much power,and the PSU was small.
The PC powered up,and the setup screen came up,then started problem 2.The bios won't recognize any of the 2 installed hard drives.
The master slave jumper setting was wrong
When i tried to install the operating system,problem 3 started.
The CD drive stopped working.It was showing lights,but the computer was not recognizing it.
Aftre half an hour of technical struggle,the cable was found faulty.
So after 4 hours,i finally made my new PC,and it's nice.
Ready to play games

Currently we use Ghz to measure our computer's power.My computer is the good old P4 with a 2.4Ghz processor.
Lets see how many Ghz a human brain is?
The retina is a nerve tissue in the back of the eyeball which detects lights and sends images to the brain. A human retina has a size of about a centimeter square is half a millimeter thick and is made up of 100 million neurons. Scientists say that the retina sends to the brain, particular patches of images indicating light intensity differences which are transported via the optic nerve, a million-fiber cable which reaches deep into the brain.

Overall, the retina seems to process about ten one-million-point images per second.

Because the 1,500 cubic centimeter human brain is about 100,000 times as large as the retina, by simple calculation, we can estimate the processing power of a average brain to be about 100 million MIPS (Million computer Instructions Per Second ). In case you're wondering how much speed that is, let us give you an idea.
According to above example in which we took retina as a unit,our brain works at 1680 Ghz of Pentium computer.
Fast isn't it?